Ùrachadh mu Dheireadh 15/08/2017
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TIOTAL
'Caithness Crack'
EXTERNAL ID
AB_LL_DONALD_OMAND_01
ÀITE
Hacraig
SGÌRE
Gallaibh an Iar
SIORRACHD/PARRAIST
GALLAIBH: Hacraig
DEIT
2008
LINN
2000an
CRUTHADAIR
Donald Omand
NEACH-FIOSRACHAIDH
Am Baile
AITHNEACHADH MAOINE
1291
KEYWORDS
claistinneach
cruthan-tìre litreachais

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Tha a' chuibhreann chlaistinneach seo o 'Caithness Crack' le Dòmhnall Omand, air a leughadh an seo le Seumas Mac a' Mhuilleir.

'On the Pension'

When asked where he'd be going when he died, a Halkirk pensioner replied: 'No question, I want tae go till Hell.' The questioner was amazed and asked why he wanted to go there. Back came the reply, 'Ah'd rather go till Hell than Heaven, as there'll be more Halkirk fowk there!'

An old tinker wifie was passing through Halkirk on the day of Queen Victoria's funeral. She asked a passer-by why the Kirk bells were ringing. When told the reason, she answered, 'Aye, I kent the Queen was died, but ah didna know she wis being buried in Halkirk!'

On retiral an old Castletown quarryman went to the Post Office to make enquiry about the payments of his old age pension. 'What was the date of your birth?' 'They didna hev deites when ah wis born!'

Maggie who had recently 'gone on the pension' called in at the Post Office and signed her book with one of these unreliable new-fangled ball-point pens. The assistant could hardly see the writing and asked if she would go over it again and put her weight on it. Maggie duly obliged and returned to the counter with her book. On it was written, 'Margaret Mackay, 14 stone.'

One old pensioner to another, 'And how are ye the day, Geordie?' 'Hingan the gether lek a weet peit!'

Rugadh Dòmhnall Omand an 8mh Faoillich 1936 air croit ann am Fearann Ùr Rostair, faisg air càirn tìodhlacaidh aosmhor Chamstair. Nuair a bha e dà bhliadhna a dh'aois, ghluais an teaghlach do bhaile beag Liaboist far an do chuir e seachad làithean òige na bhalach-sgoile a' cluich ball-coise is goilf mus deach e gu Àrd Sgoil Inbhir Ùige aig aois 15.

Chaidh e às a sin gu Oilthigh Obair Dheathain far an do choisinn e M.A. Urramach ann an Cruinn-eòlas. Choisinn e a-rithist M.Sc air 'Glaciation of Caithness' aig Oilthigh Shrath Chluaidh.

Thòisich a dhreuchd ann an teagasg ann am Bingley ann an Siorrachd York agus an uair sin chuir e seachad beagan bhliadhnachan ann an Sgoil Dara-ìre Òigridh Hacraig agus ann an Colaiste Inbhir Theòrsa, an-diugh leis an ainm Colaiste na Gàidhealtachd a Tuath. Ann an 1970 fhuair e obair ann an Oilthigh Obair Dheathain ann an Roinn Foghlaim Leanntainneach, a' sgaoileadh thar na Gàidhealtachd is nan Eilean a Tuath, gus an do leig e dheth a dhreuchd.

Am measg nan leabhraichean foillsichte aige tha feadhainn mun t-siorrachd agus mun sgìre, nam measg 'The Caithness Book' (1972) a dheasaich e an dèidh dha obair a dhèanamh air còmhla ri buidheann de dhaoine dealasach san sgìre. Fad barrachd air 30 bliadhna sgrìobh e colbhan cunbhalach sa 'John O' Groat Journal' agus sa 'Caithness Courier'.

Chaochail Dòmhnall ann an Ospadal Dhùn Barr, Inbhir Theòrsa, san Lùnastal 2009.

Airson stiùireadh mu bhith a’ cleachdadh ìomhaighean agus susbaint eile, faicibh duilleag ‘Na Cumhaichean air Fad.’
’S e companaidh cuibhrichte fo bharantas clàraichte ann an Alba Àir. SC407011 agus carthannas clàraichte Albannach Àir. SC042593 a th’ ann an High Life na Gàidhealtachd.
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'Caithness Crack'

GALLAIBH: Hacraig

2000an

claistinneach; cruthan-tìre litreachais

Am Baile

Literary Landscapes: Donald Omand

Tha a' chuibhreann chlaistinneach seo o 'Caithness Crack' le Dòmhnall Omand, air a leughadh an seo le Seumas Mac a' Mhuilleir.<br /> <br /> 'On the Pension'<br /> <br /> When asked where he'd be going when he died, a Halkirk pensioner replied: 'No question, I want tae go till Hell.' The questioner was amazed and asked why he wanted to go there. Back came the reply, 'Ah'd rather go till Hell than Heaven, as there'll be more Halkirk fowk there!'<br /> <br /> An old tinker wifie was passing through Halkirk on the day of Queen Victoria's funeral. She asked a passer-by why the Kirk bells were ringing. When told the reason, she answered, 'Aye, I kent the Queen was died, but ah didna know she wis being buried in Halkirk!'<br /> <br /> On retiral an old Castletown quarryman went to the Post Office to make enquiry about the payments of his old age pension. 'What was the date of your birth?' 'They didna hev deites when ah wis born!'<br /> <br /> Maggie who had recently 'gone on the pension' called in at the Post Office and signed her book with one of these unreliable new-fangled ball-point pens. The assistant could hardly see the writing and asked if she would go over it again and put her weight on it. Maggie duly obliged and returned to the counter with her book. On it was written, 'Margaret Mackay, 14 stone.'<br /> <br /> One old pensioner to another, 'And how are ye the day, Geordie?' 'Hingan the gether lek a weet peit!'<br /> <br /> Rugadh Dòmhnall Omand an 8mh Faoillich 1936 air croit ann am Fearann Ùr Rostair, faisg air càirn tìodhlacaidh aosmhor Chamstair. Nuair a bha e dà bhliadhna a dh'aois, ghluais an teaghlach do bhaile beag Liaboist far an do chuir e seachad làithean òige na bhalach-sgoile a' cluich ball-coise is goilf mus deach e gu Àrd Sgoil Inbhir Ùige aig aois 15. <br /> <br /> Chaidh e às a sin gu Oilthigh Obair Dheathain far an do choisinn e M.A. Urramach ann an Cruinn-eòlas. Choisinn e a-rithist M.Sc air 'Glaciation of Caithness' aig Oilthigh Shrath Chluaidh. <br /> <br /> Thòisich a dhreuchd ann an teagasg ann am Bingley ann an Siorrachd York agus an uair sin chuir e seachad beagan bhliadhnachan ann an Sgoil Dara-ìre Òigridh Hacraig agus ann an Colaiste Inbhir Theòrsa, an-diugh leis an ainm Colaiste na Gàidhealtachd a Tuath. Ann an 1970 fhuair e obair ann an Oilthigh Obair Dheathain ann an Roinn Foghlaim Leanntainneach, a' sgaoileadh thar na Gàidhealtachd is nan Eilean a Tuath, gus an do leig e dheth a dhreuchd. <br /> <br /> Am measg nan leabhraichean foillsichte aige tha feadhainn mun t-siorrachd agus mun sgìre, nam measg 'The Caithness Book' (1972) a dheasaich e an dèidh dha obair a dhèanamh air còmhla ri buidheann de dhaoine dealasach san sgìre. Fad barrachd air 30 bliadhna sgrìobh e colbhan cunbhalach sa 'John O' Groat Journal' agus sa 'Caithness Courier'.<br /> <br /> Chaochail Dòmhnall ann an Ospadal Dhùn Barr, Inbhir Theòrsa, san Lùnastal 2009.